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- Coach Kimberly
- Kimberly Chastain is the Christian Working Mom Coach and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She has a passion for encouraging and supporting Christian Working Moms. Find out more about Christian Working Moms at www.christianworkingmom.com
10 comments:
I need help dealing with the fact that my sons are almost grown. There are not many "mommy" things to do with them anymore. It makes me really sad. Every time I try to put pictures in the photo album, I have to stop because I start crying when I remember them when they were little. They are great people and I love them as adults, but I have a hard time thinking about empty nest.
God will hold you close and fill your life with His love and purpose. It sounds really difficult. Know that He loves you so much and I am praying for you. I have 2 girls who are growing too quickly as well. I love children so much and want more too. My husband is done. However, I am believing God to have a purpose for me with children in other ways to help many other children. Maybe He has a similar plan for you? Praying and asking God for comfort in your sorrow. Love in Him, Julie
I am facing a similar situation right now, in that my oldest daughter is getting ready to go to college next fall. While I won't have a totally empty nest, our home won't be the same without her there. As my two younger kids approach their teen years, I find myself with a lot more time on my hands. I've chosen to use this time to do things I've always wanted to do but didn't really feel I had the time. Just recently, after months of praying about a calling I was feeling, I stepped up to lead the youth group at our church. It has been a wonderful experience as I lead these young people, our church family's future leaders. And they have taught me as much (if not more) than I've taught them! So you see, if you keep an open heart and mind, God will lead you in directions you never had time to focus on before when you were having to more actively parent. It's a great adventure!
there's a book by barbara raney (sp?) about moms and empty nest. go to the family life website - they have it there.
cheryl
I just came home from a coffee date with one of my best friends. I have been having some problems in my marriage and every where.... she pointed out that the womens role is to be at home with the kids and to manager her home. Well I am not a stay at home mother I work full time and I am completing my degree. I do feel guilty as I think we all do sometimes...I think I would feel guilty as a stay at home mom also... I just feel confused and I know the answer is to pray and as GOD. But my friend said she just felt led to tell me that.
Hi Anonymous,
First, of all I'm sorry for all the problems you are experiencing. I can hear the pain in your comments. Your friend is right that the Bible says women are to manage the home. It does not say women are to stay home with their kids and how they are to manage their home. I have written an article on what the Bible says about working Moms. It is on the home page of www.christianworkingmom.com. You are absolutely right and wise to pray for God's wisdom. I do think we can all feel guilty for various things, but it is not always Biblical guilt. May God give you comfort and clear wisdom. I recently read the book Sacred Marriage and Sacred Influence by Gary Thomas. Both books are excellent about what the Bible teaches about marriage. May God also surround you with his love. I'm praying for you.
I'm struggling today. I feel like I just can't keep all the balls in the air. I feel as if I'm more at peace about working, but that now I'm just barely getting by. My brain is full of some many things - just can be overwhelming at times. My son informed me on the way home from school yesterday that I forgot to bring in a cereal box for him to make a Valentine box. I completely missed it! A small example, I know, but I feel like if I were at home, those things would be easier to keep track of because I won't have this whole other area of my life to keep track of...do any of you ever just feel overwhelmed? I don't want my kids to have a Mom who is frazzled. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
yes, i often feel frazzled. i mostly feel torn, though. so many times i have to choose between doing more at work - there's endless opportunities to perform more - or to say no due to something i'd rather do with my kids - like chaperone a field trip. either way i'll feel like i've ahorted someone.
i'd love to not work - only b/c it's so much pressure to be accountable to so many people.
cheryl
I do not respect my husband the way he thinks I should. Last night I realized that part of it was that he is not acting as a spiritual leader in our family. He is more interested in TV, computer, etc. I know I cannot make him do anything. Sometimes we do have prayer as a family but I have to ask for it or initiate it. I think I would respect him more if I felt like he was taking this seriously. I would like to hear input on how I can be more respectful even if I don't like what he is doing (or not doing). Thank you.
Hi Anonymous,
I certainly hear your longing for your husband to be the spiritual leader in your home. I learned a long time ago husbands desperately need a wife's respect. I would encourage you to show your husband respect in areas you do respect him in. Also, pray for him daily and that God will grow him to be the spiritual leader. My guess is when you show him more respect he will grow in that area. Encourage him. Please don't hear me not hearing your frustrations. The male ego is more fragile than I think many of us realize. Pray that God will show you how to love your husband as God loves him. Two wonderful books on this subject is Sacred Marriage and Sacred Influence by Gary Thomas. Also, the ultimate goal is praying as a family if you initiate it for awhile then that is okay. You could ask your husband for suggestions on how it should be done. Hope that helps.
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